Hand written. How nice. I like the personal touch.
Hand written. How nice. I like the personal touch.
But sorry, Rachelle, it might surprise you, but I've actually heard of Jesus. And I know the answers to those questions already. They're pretty easy.
Her address is cropped out. I'm tempted to mail her a copy of Basic D&D or something like that.
Much nicer than coming to your door to preach at you with judging eyes.
ReplyDelete...like my neighbors.
Over 200 lands worldwide. All those lands!
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like they sent the letter because they couldn't catch us at home?
ReplyDeleteWhat did the mormons get the last time they were here? A braying dog jumping on them and a crying baby. Both were quiet before they came to the door though. So thanks, nice mormon boys on bikes.
what about important questions like "Magnets: how do they work?"
ReplyDeletePaul Beakley they must play Magic?
ReplyDeleteI want to see a deck with 200 lands.
ReplyDeleteWhen somebody can ask Jesus where I left my keys and give me the correct answer, then I'll start to get interested.
ReplyDeleteDear Neighbor,
ReplyDeleteI was so delighted to receive the important information that you were "privelaged" to share with me. I would like to share something with you in return.
It is my privilege to share in a work that's been enjoyed by millions of players in myriad lands throughout the Settingverse. In all of these (imaginary) lands, monsters are being killed and their gold taken from them.
Our book, the DMG, answers such important questions as: At what point can treasure be counted for experience points? (Answer: After it is physically taken out of the dungeon or lair and turned into transportable medium or stored in the player's stronghold.) How can a DM create a well-conceived and fairly-judged campaign? (Answer: Be good to yourself as well as your players.)
Please feel free to join us on Saturday night for more information, but fair warning: I believe in the TPK.
Sincerely,
The Dungeon Master
Rafael Chandler done deal. Going in tomorrow's mail.
ReplyDeleteFuckin A
ReplyDeleteRafael Chandler wins my internet for the day.
ReplyDeleteDidn't the world end for them in 1975?
ReplyDelete"over 200 lands"? Google says there are 196 countries (195 if you don't count Taiwan, as many don't).
ReplyDeletemaybe she meant "lawns"
ReplyDeleteIt is within the realm of possibility that JWs don't actually recognize many modern nations as "lands." Totally speculating here! But I just wonder if, you know, when they're setting up missions if they think about "Galatia" or "Turkey."
ReplyDeleteI have read the Bible, or at least, several of the collections which claim that name. I am quite certain that none of them said why we grow old and die, not in any sense of the word "why" that makes any difference, nor does it state the purpose of life. The letter is very sweet but needs citations to help me find the content I apparently missed.
ReplyDeleteI don't think it's as sweet as I thought. The return address is the local temple. I bet they sit around after church and churn these out.
ReplyDeleteSweat-scribing-shop. Maybe they have kids write these as part of catechism.
ReplyDeleteThey have to do something with all that time kids have not celebrating holidays or birthdays.
ReplyDeleteI'm happy I'm not the most cynical person on G+.
ReplyDeleteLooking back at all the horrible shit I was told during catechism I can actually see how this is fairly mild and how I probably would have been forced to do this had I not lived in a place where functionally everybody was catholic.
ReplyDeleteJW kids have it pretty rough not participating in a lot of culture.
ReplyDelete